5 Things To Discuss Before Your First Threesome

If you have the right partners, a threesome can be an exciting, mind blowing sexual experience.

Ready for your first threesome? Are you sure? Sometimes the best fantasies are better left to your imagination.

However, if you have the right partners, a threesome can be an exciting, mind-blowing sexual experience. Before you start getting naked, there are some important things to go over with everyone that’s involved. Whether you’re the 3rd person, part of a couple, or one of three people deciding to get to it with two other unattached people, there are some important things to discuss:

  • Who do you (we, if you’re a couple) want to have a threesome with?

Besides the obvious list (attractive, compatible, respectful, communicative, etc.) what type of person/people are you looking for? Are you ok with bisexual or bicurious people? If you aren’t, you need to make this clear when you’re talking to prospects. If you specifically want bisexual play, make that known. Are you looking for someone who is new to this like you are? If you’d prefer a more experienced person (or couple) you might want to specify that.

  • When and where?

Decide whether you want to host in your home, in a hotel/motel, or if you’d prefer for one of the other participants to host in their home. If it’s someone you’re meeting with for the first time, it’s ok if you don’t want to invite them into your home just yet. Splitting the cost of a hotel/motel is another option. If you decide to meet at a party or a club, make sure that all three of you are comfortable with playing at that venue.

  • What do I (we) want to do, exactly?

Anyone who plans a threesome has at least a few specific ideas about what they’d like to do. Discuss the details with everyone involved so that you can better determine whether or not the others are on the same page as you. If you have a detailed scenario in mind, remember, this is real life, and there’s a chance that not everything will go as planned.

  • What don’t I (we) want to do?

When two or more people engage in sexual acts, sometimes it’s fun to just go with the flow. However, discussing hard limits is important. The last thing you want is something going somewhere in or on your body that you never wanted it to go. This also spares what could be a few awkward moments of asking for clear consent in the heat of the act.

  • What does the other person(s) want?

Even though to you, this is all about your fantasy, remember that every person involved is an equal participant. Make sure there is an opportunity for everyone to feel fulfilled and pleasured by this experience. Ask what they enjoy, and listen to them when they share their ideas of a great threesome.


Don’t forget that you’re about to try to live out a fantasy with real people. Be mindful and respectful and ready for anything. Have fun, but have patience too. If your first threesome is not as fulfilling as you had hoped, you can always try again the next time!

 

Eva Giunto on Twitter
Eva Giunto
writer at Evagiunto.com
Eva Giunto is a writer, daughter, sister, wife, mother and friend who happens to have a high sex drive. She enjoys many things besides sex, but sex is by far her favorite thing. Eva hopes to be one of many women who share a positive and realistic perspective on those of us who love sex. As women, we are esteemed as great friends, business professionals, wives, mothers, daughters, sisters, etc... yet there is still so much stigma that makes a woman with a high sex drive have to hide this facet of her life. Visit Eva Giunto for more information.
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